the stars are projectors
I am appearently fourteen years old. Friday. I agreed days ago to go with Jonathan to a party held by his co-workers at their apartment in the metropolis. Fucking jonathan, that cute bastard, I will forever be in his handsome shadow. Of course his co-workers are two beautiful rebounding drunk girls - one from a marriage. I am the king of obtuse, nerdy seduction. Drinking a lot with drunk girls doesn't impress them, it just makes everyone more drunk. I am not the king of drunk seduction. Now I'm sick. Nothing like a night of drinking to kill a good buzz. Larks. *love, ryan.
Saturday, August 23, 2003
Friday, August 22, 2003
far from the planet's shivering
This weather is so beautiful it makes me want to kill myself. Yesterday I went to blues on the green with sam. It was so pleasant outside I couldn't believe it. It would have probably been a good show if 1) there hadn't been a chair immediately in my line of sight of the stage and 2) I had been paying attention at all. I am trying to keep it very casual but I'm not sure what that means and probably couldn't do it even if I did. I want to give away all of my secrets. I've started jogging semi-regularly - strictly a 4am activity. I fell asleep at 6pm and woke at 3 and ran and ran. It was fantastic; I thought I was going to throw up, it was that good. Today epitomized a summer day: exercize, sleep, espresso+coffee, reading, buying paint brushes, drinking wine in the afternoon, painting. School starts now...say goodbye to good days of leisure...*love, ryan.
This weather is so beautiful it makes me want to kill myself. Yesterday I went to blues on the green with sam. It was so pleasant outside I couldn't believe it. It would have probably been a good show if 1) there hadn't been a chair immediately in my line of sight of the stage and 2) I had been paying attention at all. I am trying to keep it very casual but I'm not sure what that means and probably couldn't do it even if I did. I want to give away all of my secrets. I've started jogging semi-regularly - strictly a 4am activity. I fell asleep at 6pm and woke at 3 and ran and ran. It was fantastic; I thought I was going to throw up, it was that good. Today epitomized a summer day: exercize, sleep, espresso+coffee, reading, buying paint brushes, drinking wine in the afternoon, painting. School starts now...say goodbye to good days of leisure...*love, ryan.
Saturday, August 16, 2003
take time to know her
Lately, when writing, I feel like I'm on Hemingway brand methamphetamines. My posts are like telegrams. I met up with sam for books and burritos this afternoon after not enough sleep. I'm not sure what I'm getting into with this girl...It hurts when we make eye contact because her eyes swallow me whole. I loose track of everything. Went to work, stayed until late and missed all hope of bus. Went to a party with some cats from tres. Drinking games are not meant for tired people. Smoked some tea and passed the fuck out. I am lame. Nice girls put my sleeping ass on a bed. Drunk/high sleep is the best sleep ever. The only reason I'm sad about quitting the restaurant is the people. I will not allow myself to lose track of them. Goodnight, Internet. *love, ryan.
Lately, when writing, I feel like I'm on Hemingway brand methamphetamines. My posts are like telegrams. I met up with sam for books and burritos this afternoon after not enough sleep. I'm not sure what I'm getting into with this girl...It hurts when we make eye contact because her eyes swallow me whole. I loose track of everything. Went to work, stayed until late and missed all hope of bus. Went to a party with some cats from tres. Drinking games are not meant for tired people. Smoked some tea and passed the fuck out. I am lame. Nice girls put my sleeping ass on a bed. Drunk/high sleep is the best sleep ever. The only reason I'm sad about quitting the restaurant is the people. I will not allow myself to lose track of them. Goodnight, Internet. *love, ryan.
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